January 26, 2026
The virtue of Love, known as caritas or charity,
is a theological virtue defined as
loving God above all things
and loving one’s neighbor as oneself.
A friend and I had gone mall shopping not too far from my parents’ home. Finishing early, I asked Mattie if she’d mind an unplanned stop to see Mom. I knew Mom would delight in the surprise visit.
Had I alerted Mom, a banquet would have awaited us. She loved to feed people, and she did so with masterful skill. But this impromptu stop occurred the day before weekly shopping. Thus, the coffers were relatively low, at least by Mom’s standards.
Nevertheless, the kitchen table soon filled with the essential makings of a great sandwich. Mattie and I dug in as Mom arrayed a host of condiments at table’s center. However, in the abundance, one glass jar stood out in contradiction. Alone, behind the green Vlasic label, hid the last remaining kosher dill, an unlikely survivor of my family’s lunch habits.
As Mom joined us at the table, she realized the situation. She looked at Mattie, our guest, and encouraged her, “Eat the pickle, Sister!” We all burst out laughing and, indeed, Mattie did eat the lonely pickle.
Our shared laughter signaled a deeper understanding of this straightforward scene. No one had to enumerate what lay behind Mom’s encouragement:
- As our guest, you get first choice. (Hospitality)
- Somebody’s got to eat it. It might as well be you. (Practicality)
- It’s not really important if the rest of us get a pickle. (Discernment)
- We are blessed to have more choices beyond the pickle. (Gratitude)
- We’ll be fine, even if we are “pickleless”. (Blessed Assurance)
- You are the important thing, not the pickle. (Respect)
- And anyway, who left one stinkin’ pickle in the jar! (Wise Judgement)
For years to follow, Mom and I laughed about that remark. We quoted it often when there was a nebulous situation that called for a final choice, because the phrase contained all the essential elements of a loving and expeditious decision:
- What’s important in this situation?
- Who or what has the greatest need?
- What resources free us to be generous?
- What action will best reflect our values?
- And, remember:
Not to decide is to decide.
So never resist a generous impulse
I delight in remembering the story today, the anniversary of my mother’s death. She left me so many lessons under the most unlikely appearances. Who would think that a pickle jar might influence my decision-making for the ensuing 40 years!
Thank you for that pickle, Mom, and for all the other loving condiments you left to dress my life!
Music: ‘Tis A Gift to Be Simple – Yo-Yo Ma and Alison Krauss
For Your Reflection
- What feelings or reactions do I have after reading this reflection?
- Do my feelings or reactions remind me of any passage or event in scripture, especially in the life of Christ?
- What actions might I take today because of my response to these readings?
Suggested Scripture: Psalm 116: 12-19
Lavish Mercy 