Month: July 2023

Twelve

On By Renee Yann, RSMIn Community, Eternal Life, Faith, spirituality1 Comment

Wednesday of the Fourteenth Week in Ordinary Time
July 12, 2023

Today’s Readings:

https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/071223.cfm

Today, in God’s Lavish Mercy, we have the stories of two sets of twelve men:

  • Joseph and his brothers, heads of the twelve tribes of Israel
    (Reuben, Simeon, Levi, Judah, Dan, Naphtali, Gad, Asher, Issachar, Zebulun, Joseph, and Benjamin)
  • the twelve Apostles chosen by Jesus
    (Simon Peter, Andrew, James, John, Philip, Bartholomew, Thomas, Matthew, James, Thaddeus, Simon, Judas)

Joseph Oversees Egypt’s Granaries – Lawrence Alma-Tadema

Each of these pillars of the Judea-Christian tradition had their individual faith stories which have called generations either to imitate or contradict them. We want to be like faithful, fumbling Peter but not like clever, devious Judas. We abhor the muderous jealousy of the 10 brothers, but admire the generous forgiveness of Joseph.

These ageless stories present us with the mysterious beauty of the Scriptures which allow us to find our best and worst selves within them. But more significantly, beyond mirroring all human experience, these stories reflect God’s abiding Presence in the unfolding of human and individual history.

The Joseph narrative, which we have a small part of today, presents a whole new way of looking at God’s relationship with Israel. God is not an overt actor in the narrative as in the early Pentateuch accounts, but rather the hidden Agency in a long and sustained drama.

(The Joseph narrative) urges that in the contingencies of history, the purposes of God are at work in hidden and unnoticed ways. But the ways of God are nonetheless reliable and will come to fruition….
The purposes of God are not wrought here by abrupt action or by (heavenly) intrusions, but by the ways of the world which seem to be natural and continuous.

Walter Brueggemann: Genesis, A Bible Commentary for Teaching and Preaching

As I read Bruggemann’s commentary, I think of the many times my religious community has come together for story-telling during a Sister’s funeral rites. Within an inspirational hour, the extended history of this Sister’s life is gathered into a powerful statement reflecting both God’s and her long fidelity.

As in Joseph’s story, God has not spoken aloud, but has spoken nonetheless clearly, in and through each remembered life. The grateful community is left in quiet and joyful awe at the end of each ritual, amazed and convinced that God is silently present in every person’s story, even one’s own.

Today’s Responsorial Psalm may capture our sentiments as we consider our own lives in the light of today’s readings. We can take great comfort in the belief that, in the eternal design, all things come to wholeness for those who trust God.

The LORD brings to nought the plans of nations;
and foils the designs of peoples.
But the plan of the LORD stands forever;
the design of God’s heart, through all generations.

Psalm 33:10-11

Poetry: The Thread of Life – Christina Rossetti

The irresponsive silence of the land,
The irresponsive sounding of the sea,
Speak both one message of one sense to me: —
Aloof, aloof, we stand aloof, so stand
Thou too aloof bound with the flawless band
Of inner solitude; we bind not thee;
But who from thy self-chain shall set thee free?
What heart shall touch thy heart? what hand thy hand?—
And I am sometimes proud and sometimes meek,
And sometimes I remember days of old
When fellowship seemed not so far to seek
And all the world and I seemed much less cold,
And at the rainbow's foot lay surely gold,
And hope felt strong and life itself not weak.

2

Thus am I mine own prison. Everything
Around me free and sunny and at ease:
Or if in shadow, in a shade of trees
Which the sun kisses, where the gay birds sing
And where all winds make various murmuring;
Where bees are found, with honey for the bees;
Where sounds are music, and where silences
Are music of an unlike fashioning.
Then gaze I at the merrymaking crew,
And smile a moment and a moment sigh
Thinking: Why can I not rejoice with you ?
But soon I put the foolish fancy by:
I am not what I have nor what I do;
But what I was I am, I am even I.

3

Therefore myself is that one only thing
I hold to use or waste, to keep or give;
My sole possession every day I live,
And still mine own despite Time's winnowing.
Ever mine own, while moons and seasons bring
From crudeness ripeness mellow and sanative;
Ever mine own, till Death shall ply his sieve;
And still mine own, when saints break grave and sing.
And this myself as king unto my King
I give, to Him Who gave Himself for me;
Who gives Himself to me, and bids me sing
A sweet new song of His redeemed set free;
He bids me sing: O death, where is thy sting?
And sing: O grave, where is thy victory?

Music: Air on the G String – J.S.Bach, played by Hauser

Unbound by Mercy

On By Renee Yann, RSMIn Conversion, Creation, Faith, Jesus, Mercy, spirituality4 Comments

Memorial of Saint Benedict, Abbot
Tuesday of the Fourteenth Week in Ordinary Time
July 11, 2023

Today’s Readings:

https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/071123.cfm

Today, in God’s Lavish Mercy, Jacob wrestles with an angel and Jesus cures a man muted by demons.

Jesus Cures a Deaf Mute – Tissot Jacob Wrestles with an Angel – Bonnat

Thinking of these two figures this morning, I was reminded of one of my all-time most influential books, “Womanspirit Rising“. In the late 1970s, I first read this now classic anthology of feminist theology. It changed the whole framework of how I saw the world.

A key concept in the collection is a phrase written by theologian Nelle Morton which describes how women, despite the obstructions of patriarchy, can help one another to self-realization by practicing deep listening to one another. Morton calls this ministry:

“hearing one another into speech”

The point is that when our pain and struggles are truly listened to, we can begin to name and explore our own healing.

I think this is exactly what Jesus did for the man muted by demons. Jesus heard this man’s pain before the man could speak it. The Spirit of Jesus was one so attuned to all Creation that he could hear the “Sound beyond sound” within this man’s suffering.

Jesus’ unspoken response to the speechless man is the same that he offers to all of us …. Infinite, Lavish Mercy:

At the sight of the crowds,
his heart was moved to breaking for them
because they were troubled and abandoned,
like sheep without a shepherd.

Matthew 9:32-36

In our Genesis passage, Jacob is fighting his own form of “demons” — one that, in this case, turns out to be an angel, a giver of blessing!

Some man wrestled with him until the break of dawn.
When the man saw that he could not prevail over him,
he struck Jacob’s hip at its socket,
so that the hip socket was wrenched as they wrestled.
The man then said, “Let me go, for it is daybreak.”
But Jacob said, “I will not let you go until you bless me.”
The man asked, “What is your name?”
He answered, “Jacob.”
Then the man said,
“You shall no longer be spoken of as Jacob, but as Israel,
because you have contended with divine and human beings
and have prevailed.”

Genesis 32:25-29

The entire night’s struggle is executed in silence. It is not until dawn that the combatants speak. Like the Gosple mute, Jacob’s true self is liberated by a silent hearing. As a result, he is blessed with a new identity and a new name – “Israel”.

When we were very young nuns, our Mistress of Postulants was filled with unexpected, old-fashioned wisdom. For example, her recommendation to our vocational doubts was to “sleep on them”. She counseled that “everything looks better in the morning.” Simplistic though it may have sounded, she was right!

Some of the turbulent adjustments, which could not be articulated in the dark hours, found expression and resolve in morning light – when we could see one another clearly and listen heartily to each other’s confusions. Such listening helped to either evaporate the troubles or to suggest a clear path through them.

That early experience was a simple time for me of growing in self-understanding. But it offered a more complex truth – that, not only we, but all the suffering world needs to be “heard into speech“. This is the work of Mercy as we see it so tenderly expressed in today’s Gospel.

In such times of deep listening and new naming, the God of miracles is with us. These times in our lives can help us become deep listeners to the world’s pain, re-christeners of the world’s hope, humble architects of God’s tender design for our wholeness:

For Professor Nelle Morton, the hearing to speech is not just a human phenomenon, but one that occurs because of a prior divine hearing and listening. We are able to hear one another into speech (and thus, perhaps, into full humanity) because we are first heard by “a prior great Listening Ear . . . an ear that hears . . . our own”

Dr. Elaine Graham – Professor of Social and Pastoral Theology at the University of Manchester.

Poetry: Listening – from Rumi

What is the deep listening? Sama is
a greeting from the secret ones inside
the heart, a letter. The branches of
your intelligence grow new leaves in
the wind of this listening. The body
reaches a peace. Rooster sound comes,
reminding you of your love for dawn.
The reed flute and the singer's lips:
the knack of how spirit breathes into
us becomes as simple and ordinary as
eating and drinking. The dead rise with
the pleasure of listening. If someone
can't hear a trumpet melody, sprinkle
dirt on his head and declare him dead.
Listen, and feel the beauty of your
separation, the unsayable absence.
There's a moon inside every human being.
Learn to be companions with it. Give
more of your life to this listening. As
brightness is to time, so you are to
the one who talks to the deep ear in
your chest. I should sell my tongue
and buy a thousand ears when that
one steps near and begins to speak.

Music: Whispering Sea – Tony O’Connor

“Ifs” and “In-Betweens”

On By Renee Yann, RSMIn Courage, Faith, spirituality6 Comments

Monday of the Fourteenth Week in Ordinary Time
July 10, 2023

Today’s Readings:

https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/071023.cfm

Today, in God’s Lavish Mercy, Genesis takes us deeper into the story of Jacob, and Matthew tells of a faith-filled centurion and a hope-filled woman. These are a wonderful narratives painted in images so intense that they have infused the prayers of generations.

Jacob’s Ladder by William Blake

Jacob and his mother have successfully stolen the birthright from Esau. But now Jacob, threatened with muder by his wronged brother, is an exile seeking a place to live out his life.

Jacob is on a journey in between his past and his future, between his choices and his regrets, between his security and his hope. He is in a place of momentous “ifs” because he has no “for sures” in hand.

Pausing at a shrine, Jacob sleeps and dreams of angels, of a laddered freeway to heaven. God appears and speaks to him, reiterating the essence of the Abrahamic promises.

By Divine Graciousness, God has intruded on Jacob’s “in-betweeness”

In you and your descendants
all the nations of the earth shall find blessing.
Know that I am with you;
I will protect you wherever you go,
and bring you back to this land.
I will never leave you until I have done what I promised you.”

Genesis 28:14-15

The experience moves Jacob to make a vow, hinged on a particular word of hope : IF

“If God remains with me,
to protect me on this journey I am making
and to give me enough bread to eat and clothing to wear,
and I come back safe to my father’s house, the LORD shall be my God.
This stone that I have set up as a memorial stone shall be God’s abode.”

Genesis 28:20-22

If I But Touch the Hem by James Tissot

In our Gospel, the suffering woman pivots her hope on the same word: IF

A woman suffering hemorrhages for twelve years came up behind him
and touched the tassel on his cloak.
She said to herself, “If only I can touch his cloak, I shall be cured.”
Jesus turned around and saw her, and said,
“”Courage, daughter! Your faith has saved you.””
And from that hour the woman was cured.

Matthew 9:20-22

It is clear from God’s spontaneous generosity in both these passages that Divine Mercy does not swing on an “IF“. God waits for us to open our hearts. God’s Promise is constant, and God’s Will for our wholeness in immutable. The “IFs” are our constructions, not God’s. God is with us no matter what, not if.

Most of our life is spent atwix one thing and another – between youth and old age, sickness and healing, security and contentment, courage and fear, indifference and awareness … beginnings and endings in a thousand forms. It is at these in-between places that God waits for us, as God did for Jacob, as Jesus did for the suffering woman.

“In-between” is usually an uncomfortable place because we are stretched between growth and passivity. But in the stretch, we may find a holy place, as Jacob did. In the reach of our heart for the hem of God’s garment we, like the extravasating woman, may find new life.

Poetry: That Passeth All Understanding – Denise Levertov

An awe so quiet 
I don’t know when it began. 

A gratitude 
had begun 
to sing in me. 

Was there 
some moment 
dividing 
song from no song? 

When does dewfall begin? 

When does night 
fold its arms over our hearts 
to cherish them? 

When is daybreak?

Music: In Between – J.J. Pfeifer (lyrics below)

In between the day and the night
In between the dark and the light
In between what′s wrong and what’s right
I′ll find you

I’m not really sure just why I care
My heart is broken and I’m scared
Walls are coming down
My defense is on the ground
I′m falling

In between the day and the night
In between the dark and the light
In between what′s wrong and what’s right
I′ll find you

I don’t want to lose you
Can′t stand the pain
I wanna feel the sun
Not always feel the rain
Walls are coming down
My defense is on the ground
I’m falling

In between the day and the night
In between the dark and the light
In between what′s wrong and what’s right
I’ll find you (find you)

I′ll find you
Forever beside you (beside you)
I′ll find you
Breathing inside you
I’ll find you

I′ll find you
I’ll find you

God’s Silent Power

On By Renee Yann, RSMIn Conversion, Discipleship, Eternal Life, Faith, spirituality8 Comments

Fourteenth Sunday in Ordinary Time
July 9, 2023

Today’s Readings:

https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/070923.cfm

Today, in God’s Lavish Mercy, our readings lead us to a converted understanding of life, one that couterposes war and peace, flesh and spirit, labor and rest.

Zechariah describes it.
He shall banish the chariot from Ephraim,
and the horse from Jerusalem;
the warrior’s bow shall be banished,
and he shall proclaim peace to the nations.

Paul preaches it.
We are not debtors to the flesh,
to live according to the flesh. 
For if you live according to the flesh, you will die,
but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body,
you will live.

Jesus invites us to it.
Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened,
and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me,
for I am meek and humble of heart;
and you will find rest for yourselves. 
For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.

What do the prophet, the preacher, and the Messiah ask of us in these readings? What does the Church ask by grouping them for this Fourteenth Sunday?

These readings ask us to turn our lives upside down. By describing what the Reign of God is like, these readings challenge us to confront the commonly accepted misperceptions of our world and turn them inside out.

Zechariah tells us that the Reign of God is not accomplished by war or any other expression of human power over Creation. It is accomplished by the meek and humble justice which pours mercy over all of us:

Rejoice heartily, O daughter Zion,
shout for joy, O daughter Jerusalem!
See, your king shall come to you;
a just savior is he,
meek, and riding on a donkey,
on a colt, the foal of a donkey.

Zechariah 9:9

Paul tells us that the Reign of God blossoms from the Spirit of Christ within us and not from any material appearance of success – be it beauty, wealth, physical strength, or wrested power.

If the Spirit of the one who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you,
the one who raised Christ from the dead
will give life to your mortal bodies also,
through his Spirit that dwells in you.
Consequently, brothers and sisters,
we are not debtors to the flesh,
to live according to the flesh.
For if you live according to the flesh, you will die,
but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body,
you will live.

Romans 8: 11-13

Jesus, reminiscent of Zechariah, invites us to rest in the mystery of God’s humble love for us – expressed in the very Person of Christ given for our redemption.

Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened,
and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me,
for I am meek and humble of heart;
and you will find rest for yourselves.
For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.

Matthew 11:28-30

These passages are dense with meaning and mystery. In holy contradiction to a soulless world, they call us to live in, and witness to God’s Silent Power underlying life’s visible appearances. Within this Power, the peacful are the conquerers, the spiritual are the fulfilled, and those bearing the yoke of Christ are freed.

Poetry: The Ponds ― Mary Oliver, from House of Light

Every year
the lilies
are so perfect
I can hardly believe

their lapped light crowding
the black,
mid-summer ponds.
Nobody could count all of them --

the muskrats swimming
among the pads and the grasses
can reach out
their muscular arms and touch

only so many, they are that
rife and wild.
But what in this world
is perfect?

I bend closer and see
how this one is clearly lopsided --
and that one wears an orange blight --
and this one is a glossy cheek

half nibbled away --
and that one is a slumped purse
full of its own
unstoppable decay.

Still, what I want in my life
is to be willing
to be dazzled --
to cast aside the weight of facts

and maybe even
to float a little
above this difficult world.
I want to believe I am looking

into the white fire of a great mystery.
I want to believe that the imperfections are nothing --
that the light is everything -- that it is more than the sum
of each flawed blossom rising and fading. And I do.

Music: Invisible Peace – F.C. Perini

The Promise Survives Deception

On By Renee Yann, RSMIn Conversion, Eternal Life, Faith, Gospel, Jesus, spirituality1 Comment

Saturday of the Thirteenth Week in Ordinary Time
July 8, 2023

Today’s Readings:

https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/070823.cfm

Today, in God’s Lavish Mercy, Genesis presents us with a story that may make us pick sides.

Jacob Deceives Isaac (Rebekah in back). James Jacques Joseph Tissot. c. 1896-1902.

(All I can say is that Esau must have been one hairy dude!)

Old, blind Isaac, sensing death on the horizon, dramatically prepares to hand over the promise to Esau. But his wife Rebekah has other ideas:

Rebekah then took the best clothes of her older son Esau
that she had in the house,
and gave them to her younger son Jacob to wear;
and with the skins of the kids she covered up his hands
and the hairless parts of his neck.
Then she handed her son Jacob the appetizing dish
and the bread she had prepared.

Genesis 27:15-17

It’s a fascinating and powerful narrative. I can see the movie trailer in my mind’s eye:

Watch as “The Promise” is passed to the wrong son
by means of his mother’s deception.

So is that what the story is about? Well, only on the surface.

The real story stars an Actor who is never mentioned in the script:

God, the Promise Keeper

This Bible passage teaches that God does not deviate from the Promise, no matter how the other players manipulate its unfolding. God performs the Promise despite human fiddling.

Friends, aren’t we just a little bit like Rebekah and Jacob? When our life’s dramas swirl around us, don’t we make every effort possible to salvage our own designs? It’s human nature, and it’s all good.

But all the same, God must smile at us and our sometimes frenzied efforts to control our lives. I think God smiled like that at Rebekah, covering her favorite son with smelly sheepskins so as to deceive her hungry husband.

Rebekah thought she had a better plan, but it was God’s plan all the time!

It takes some of us so long to realize that we can’t control much of our life. We can only engage our days, trusting that, as they unfold for us, they carry the promise and will of God for our hallowing.

By grace, we can learn to receive our lives as an infinite river of blessing, with all its natural turns. We can pray to trust that blessing when it is hidden in the curve of life’s shadows.

In our Gospel, the Baptist’s disciples are confused by Jesus’ behavior because it contradicts the old Law which offered them a controllable path to holiness.

Jesus tells them that the Law of Requirements is no longer sufficient. It is an old wineskin.
With the new wine of the Gospel, He is calling them to trust and enfold themselves in the Law of Love.

No one patches an old cloak with a piece of unshrunken cloth,
for its fullness pulls away from the cloak and the tear gets worse.
People do not put new wine into old wineskins.
Otherwise the skins burst, the wine spills out, and the skins are ruined.
Rather, they pour new wine into fresh wineskins, and both are preserved.

Matthew 9:16-17

Poetry: Late Ripeness – Czeslaw Milosz

Not soon, as late as the approach of my ninetieth year,
I felt a door opening in me and I entered
the clarity of early morning.
One after another my former lives were departing,
Like ships, together with their sorrow.
And the countries, cities, gardens, the bays of seas
assigned to my brush came closer,
ready now to be described better than they were before.
I was not separated from people,
grief and pity joined us.
We forget -- I kept saying -- that we are all children of
the King.
For where we come from there is no division
Into Yes and No, into is, was, and it will be.
We were miserable, we used no more than a hundredth part
of the gift we received for our long journey.
Moments from yesterday and from centuries ago --
a sword blow, the painting of eyelashes before a mirror
of polished metal, a lethal musket shot, a caravel
staving its hull against a reef -- they dwell in us,
waiting for a fulfillment.
I knew, always, that I would be a worker in the vineyard,
as are all men and women living at the same time,
whether they are aware of it or not.

Music: Piano and Flute Meditation – by Laura Sullivan

Universal Call

On By Renee Yann, RSMIn Conversion, Discipleship, Faith, healing, Jesus, spiritualityLeave a comment

Friday of the Thirteenth Week in Ordinary Time
July 7, 2023

Today’s Readings:

https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/070723.cfm

Today, in God’s Lavish Mercy, each of our readings presents a story of vocation and how it is fulfilled in a lifespan.

Our reading from Genesis describes four people at different stages of their life’s vocation: Abraham and Sarah in its fulfillment, Isaac and Rebekah in its initial hope.

For my prayer, I focused on Abraham who is closing out his story in peace, prosperity, and active hope for a future he will not see:

Abraham had now reached a ripe old age,
and the LORD had blessed him in every way.
Abraham said to the senior servant of his household,
who had charge of all his possessions:
“Put your hand under my thigh,
and I will make you swear by the LORD,
the God of heaven and the God of earth, …
… that you will go to my own land and to my kindred
to get a wife for my son Isaac.”

Genesis 24:1-4

Both Abraham and Sarah lived long and fruitful lives, matured in faith, and died in peace. Through the extensive history of their lives, they listened to and trusted God (on and off!), acted for God’s glory, and guided their household in God’s way.

They listened, responded and connected their lives irrevocably to God’s vision.
It is at once a simple and a challenging formula for spiritual fulfillment.

In our Gospel, Matthew is called to the same formula which is the underpinning of any vocation:

As Jesus passed by,
he saw a man named Matthew sitting at the customs post.
He said to him, “”Follow me.””
And he got up and followed him.
While he was at table in his house,
many tax collectors and sinners came
and sat with Jesus and his disciples.
The Pharisees saw this and said to his disciples,
“”Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?””
He heard this and said,
“Those who are well do not need a physician, but the sick do.
Go and learn the meaning of the words,
I desire mercy, not sacrifice.”

Matthew 9:9-12

Matthew listens to Jesus’ call, responds,
and connects his life irrevocably to Jesus’ vision.

The continuing call for each of us is clear. Each of our lives offers us a particular expression of “vocation”. It may be as religious, priest, parent, spouse, family member, teacher, caregiver, public servant, or any other role that places us in loving and responsible relationship with our neighbor.

In that role, can we/do we:

  • listen for God in every circumstance
  • respond in faith, hope, and love
  • witness a Christ-rooted life by our actions for Gospel justice and mercy

Poetry: Vocation by William E. Stafford

This dream the world is having about itself 
includes a trace on the plains of the Oregon trail, 
a groove in the grass my father showed us all 
one day while meadowlarks were trying to tell
something better about to happen. 

I dreamed the trace to the mountains, over the hills, 
and there a girl who belonged wherever she was; 
but then my mother called us back to the car: 
she was afraid; she always blamed the place,
the time, anything my father planned. 

Now both of my parents, the long line through the plain, 
the meadowlarks, the sky, the world's whole dream 
remain, and I hear him say while I stand between the two,
helpless, both of them part of me:
"Your job is to find what the world is trying to be."

Music: The Call – Celtic Women sing a song written by Anthony Downes

God Will Provide

On By Renee Yann, RSMIn Conversion, Faith, spirituality3 Comments

Thursday of the Thirteenth Week in Ordinary Time
July 6, 2023

Today’s Readings:

https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/070623.cfm

Today, in God’s Lavish Mercy, we are challenged by one of the most difficult passages in Genesis – the testing of Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac.

The USCCB website says this about the passage:

The story is widely recognized as a literary masterpiece, depicting in a few lines God as the absolute Lord, inscrutable yet ultimately gracious, and Abraham, acting in moral grandeur as the great ancestor of Israel.

Walter Brueggeman agrees:

This chapter is among the best known and theologically most demanding in the Abraham tradition. It poses acute questions about the nature of faith and the way of God with his faithful creature.

Nevertheless, I have always been repelled by the story of Isaac’s sacrifice. On a human level, it leaves me with a bad taste for Abraham and – yes – even for God. I have made all kinds of excuses for why such a violent story is even included in sacred scripture. And in all these resistant machinations, I have missed the whole point of this Biblical classic.

This is not a story about father/son conflict, or an angry god, or of human sacrifice.

This is a story about learning to live a life of resolute and complete faith.

When I prayed with the verses in that light, I remembered how God has been wound into my life in the very ways we find in this passage.

I’m sure, dear readers, that each one of you, like me, has heard God’s call many times in your life, trusted God’s promise to lead you, and yet run into a few brick walls along the way. Some of these walls may have been huge, threatening to separate you from your life’s treasures: your health, hope, loves, achievements, reputation or chosen future.

That’s what happened to Abraham. Isaac was his treasure. When that treasure was threatened, could Abraham retain unquestioning trust in God?

We find the answer in verse 8:

As the two walked on together, Isaac spoke to his father Abraham:
“Father!” he said.
“Yes, son,” he replied.
Isaac continued, “Here are the fire and the wood,
but where is the sheep for the burnt offering?”
“Son,” Abraham answered,
“God himself will provide the sheep for the burnt offering.“
Then the two continued going forward.

God himself will provide…

… the expression of absolute trust

Although the wall may separate him from everything else, Abraham will not allow it to separate him from God. He does all that is required of him, and then he chooses to trust. And in that choice, all things are transformed and restored to Abraham.

Like Abraham, by our choice to trust and believe, we free God to be God for us. We have no control over the walls life might throw before us. But we can control how we face them. We are freed for new life by trusting that God will deliver us from every evil, even if it be in ways we would never design or imagine ourselves.

Even though it was centuries before Jesus gave us the prayer, I imagine Abraham climbing Mt. Moriah with sentiments similar to the Our Father in his heart:

Our Father,  in heaven
holy is your Name.
May your holy balance come to us,
Your Will be done, here,
as it is in heaven.
Give us today what we need to survive,
and forgive us for choosing darkness
when you have offered us your Light.
Lead us not head first 
into the walls that threaten,
but deliver us from evil.
For You are God, and that is enough for us,
in all things and forever.
Amen.

Music: Faithful Now – Vertical Worship

Don’t Be Afraid

On By Renee Yann, RSMIn Conversion, Courage, Faith, justice, spirituality5 Comments

Wednesday of the Thirteenth Week in Ordinary Time
July 5, 2023

Today’s Readings:

https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/070523.cfm

Today, in God’s Lavish Mercy, our readings encourage us not to be afraid.

“Do not be afraid”, or one of its many forms (e.g. “take courage”, “be at peace”), is a phrase that appears frequently in scripture. It is often uttered by God. And it usually occurs at a point of human desperation but spiritual opportunity for the one who actually is afraid.

Today, Genesis offers us the story of Hagar, the enslaved concubine of Abraham and mother of his eldest son Ishmael. Hagar draws the fearful scorn of Sarah after Sarah bears Isaac. Sarah is afraid that the older boy, Ismael, will inherit what she wants only for her own son. Sarah forces Abraham to send Hagar away as our passage today describes:

Sarah noticed the son whom Hagar the Egyptian
had borne to Abraham
playing with her son Isaac;
so she demanded of Abraham:
“Drive out that slave and her son!
No son of that slave is going to share the inheritance
with my son Isaac!”

Genesis 21:9-10

Sarah is worried about Abraham’s material legacy, but God knows there is an infinitely greater endowment to be left to the children of Abraham. God does not limit that promise to Isaac alone:

God said to Abraham: “Do not be distressed about the boy
or about your slave woman.
Heed the demands of Sarah, no matter what she is asking of you;
for it is through Isaac that descendants shall bear your name.
As for the son of the slave woman,
I will make a great nation of him also,
since he too is your offspring.”

Gemesis 21:12-13

Poor Hagar trods off into the desert with baby Ismael where, finally bereft of water, food, and energy she sits down near some bushes to die.

As she sat opposite Ishmael, he began to cry.
God heard the boy’s cry,
and God’s messenger called to Hagar from heaven:
“What is the matter, Hagar?
Don’t be afraid; God has heard the boy’s cry in this plight of his.
Arise, lift up the boy and hold him by the hand;
for I will make of him a great nation.”
Then God opened her eyes, and she saw a well of water.
She went and filled the skin with water, and then let the boy drink.

Genesis 21:14-19

God opened Hagar’s eyes and she could see the means of her survival – a fresh well in the desert.

“Seeing” is a key reflection point of this passage. When no one else cared to see Hagar as a person, God saw her. When Hagar was at the very edge of existence, her spiritual eyes were cleared and she saw God.

This passage from Genesis invites us to reflect on:

  • times we have felt “invisible” or afraid in our lives, and how that circumstance may have offered us a new understanding of God
  • times when we have been blind to the fear or desperation of others who needed us to notice their marginalization

Hagar, (like Adam, Abraham, Jonah, David, Ruth), is an archetype of the Hebrew Scriptures. Yet her powerful story often takes second place to those of the great ancestors, just as she herself took second place to Sarah in the Abrahamic canon. I found an excellent article about Hagar as I prepared this reflection. If you would like to read it, the link is below.

https://digitalcommons.denison.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1096&context=religion

Poetry: I Return to the Church – Carolyn Marie Rogers

I like this poem because it speaks to me of the appreciation which grows in us as we mature in faith and experience. The poet seems to have passed through a “desert”, from youth to a later age. It is only then that she recognizes all the grace she did not “see” in her earlier life.

Spoons of love and
grace, mushy with mercy,
like oatmeal in a bowl
hushes my mouth into
sugary sweet solemnity.
A neophyte’s reverence.
Holiness. Me. God’s witness
recipient.
A finger to make a cross
across my lips.
And is this love?
Oh yes, this is love
when I come, returned from
the world from walking through
hells, my hungry years.
Hunger that is called youth
looking for rainbows, promised
lands, edens, and paradises.
Only to find it all
that I left behind, that
I could not see like Hagar.
And I did not
even know the word,
desert.

Music: Hagar’s Song – Sue Hahn, writer; Amanda Hopper, vocalist (lyrics below)

A life of injustice is all I have known.
Shamed and mistreated I’ve never been loved.
My dignity’s taken. I finally fled
alone and forsaken in this wilderness

You speak my name like you really know me.
You ask where I’ve come from 
and where I am going
You tell me return, there is no need to run.
You give me your blessing, a name for my son.

You are the God who sees me.
You are the God who hears me.
You keep all your promises.
You know all my fears.
You met me in my wilderness
wandering in despair.
I will choose to trust and obey.
You are the God who cares.

Now we are abandoned, 
a wasteland to roam.
My son won’t survive here,
nowhere to call home.
Life seems so hopeless.
We’ve cried all we can.
I thought you’d protect us .
Did I misunderstand?

You speak my name,
“Hagar, Don’t Be Afraid”.
You’ve seen all our tears 
and your plan hasn’t changed.
They’ve reawakened, 
you open my eyes.
A well in the desert proves
You will provide.

You are the God who sees me.
You are the God who hears me
You keep promises.
You know all my fears.
You met me in my wilderness
wandering in despair.
I will choose to trust and obey.
You are the God who cares
This is not the path I would have chosen
but it’s the one that led me straight to You.
Just when I was sure my life was over
You retold my story with your truth.
You see me; You know me.
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
you see me and you know me
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Chaos, Prayer, and Mercy

On By Renee Yann, RSMIn Faith, Gospel, Scripture, spiritualityLeave a comment

Tuesday of the Thirteenth Week in Ordinary Time
July 4, 2023

Today’s Readings:

https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/070423.cfm

Today, in God’s Lavish Mercy, we resume our readings from Genesis and Matthew – and they’re packed with action and inspiration!

Sodom and Gomorrha by Henry Osawa Tanner

(Note Lot’s wife left behind in white)

If you’re “of an age” like me, you might remember your old Bible History class and first hearing the story of Lot and his “mortonized” wife.

I spent a lot of my 7-year-old energy wondering what she looked like as a salty pillar. I even imagined how she might have melted in the next rain after the meteor set Sodom on fire.

But most of all, I felt bad for her. I mean, really, one glance backward and ZAP! And by correlation, I felt bad for myself because, even at that young age, I realized that I was quite capable of backward glances once God had spoken. And it scared me.

Was God really like that?!

Looking back on those childhood feelings, I consider how my faith and perception of God have evolved over the course of my now long life. The God of my grade school years was not the God of my late teens and twenties. Nor was that God of my young adulthood the God of my 50s and 60s.

Did God grow and change during those years? Of course not. It was I who deepened, widened, and mellowed in experience and grace.

The stories in Genesis, and throughout the Hebrew Scriptures, were told and interpreted over many centuries before they were ever written down. After being written down, they have continued to be studied and parsed even into our own times.

Just as we grow in the spiritual understanding of our own lives, we mature in our ability to look through the surface of scriptures to their deep and sacred meaning.

As Christians, we must read the ancient scriptures in the light of the Gospel. We have the advantage and responsibility to seek the deep spiritual understanding resident within these stories. Buried in a sometimes bizarre passage is the fundamental truth of God’s abiding Presence, no matter our circumstances.

The particular words used to convey these stories were designed for and by people of a very different culture from ours. Some of the concepts are relayed in a primitive manner that may not speak to a modern reader. But we can’t let ourselves get stuck on those cultural differences — the way I did when I was seven years old.

The story of Abraham, Lot and Lot’s wife is not a news report about some family that avoids a natural disaster save for one disobedient member.

It is instead a parable which invites us to consider God’s persistent desire for our wholeness despite our own resistance to that grace. If we continually harden our spirits to God’s invitation to relationship, it is we, not God, who make the choice to distance ourselves in spiritual exile.

Yet, Genesis tells us that, even if we make that distancing choice, all is not lost. We cannot cause God to disassociate from us, no matter how hard we might try. There is always a path back to the heart of God – even if it leads through a storm of brimstone.

As our Gospel assures us, even in the scariest of storms, our God is with us:

They came and woke him, saying,
“Lord, save us! We are perishing!”
He said to them, “Why are you terrified, O you of little faith?”
Then he got up, rebuked the winds and the sea,
and there was great calm.

Poetry: Lot’s Wife – Anna Akhmatova

And the just man trailed God's shining agent,
over a black mountain, in his giant track,
while a restless voice kept harrying his woman:
"It's not too late, you can still look back
at the red towers of your native Sodom,
the square where once you sang, the spinning-shed,
at the empty windows set in the tall house
where sons and daughters blessed your marriage-bed."
A single glance: a sudden dart of pain
stitching her eyes before she made a sound . . .
Her body flaked into transparent salt,
and her swift legs rooted to the ground.
Who will grieve for this woman? Does she not seem
too insignificant for our concern?
Yet in my heart I never will deny her,
who suffered death because she chose to turn.

Music: The Love I Have for You , O Lord – sung by James Kilbane

Who Have Not Seen Yet Believe

On By Renee Yann, RSMIn Conversion, Discipleship, Faith, Jesus, spirituality1 Comment

Feast of Saint Thomas, Apostle
July 3, 2023

Today’s Readings:

https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/070323.cfm

Today, in God’s Lavish Mercy, we pray with Psalm 117. We do so in the spirit of Thomas, who now offers his unquestioning faith to our patient and forgiving Jesus.

Praise the LORD, all you nations;
    glorify him, all you peoples!
For steadfast is his kindness for us,
    and the fidelity of the LORD endures forever

Psalm 117: 1-2

Faith is not a commodity or an achievement.
Faith is relationship and a journey.

It is a gift and an exercise of grace.
Never stretched, it withers like a brittle ligament.

It ebbs and flows with our personal and communal dramas.
It deepens with prayer, silent reaching, and a listening obedience to our lives.
It shallows with our demands, like Thomas’s, only to see and to touch.

It is fed by the Lavish Mercy of God Who never cuts its flow to our souls
if we but take down the seawall around our heart.

On this day when we celebrate the power of tested and proven faith,
may we bring our needs into the circle gathered in that Upper Room.

Standing beside Thomas today in our prayer,
may we place our trust in the glorified wounds of Christ.

A video today for our prayer: Blessed Are They That Have Not Seen

Music: Healing Touch – Deuter

As we reach out in faith with Thomas to touch Christ’s wounds, let us open our hearts to receive the returning touch of God’s Lavish Mercy.